GOD invented strip clubs to make up for the whole Adam and Eve and the apple fiasco.
Tucson - Tens
Real grimey. Chicks are about a 7 out of 10. but it was the best time. My bachelor party. So I got pulled up on the stage. They didn't do me to bad but it was over the top. 3 stripper danced on me and beat me up pretty good and then I had to dance for them. At this point I was so drunk I just dumbed out and when 2 Live Crew stripper dancer mode. I started popping and shit. My boys still wont let me live it down till this day. The whole club clapped when I got off the stage.
Las Vegas - Wild J's
Hella grimey. I went with my boy Abysmal. It was so dead, the girls just came up and started talking to us.... butt necked. There were 8 girls and only 2 other customers. Since we were only 22 at the time, they were happy to meet some young guys instead of the crusty truckers that are normally in there.
Phoenix - Le Girls
The girls were perfect 10s but they were the worst lap dancers. Only concerned about getting your money. But man they were hot. The DJ threw on some Marilyn Manson Beautiful People and like 15 bitches came out of no where. Dancing of every stage. Nuts.
Phoenix - ?????
Can't remember the name. It was under the I-17 highway. Went there when I was 21. The girls did not care. I was treated to a 2-girl lap dance. It sucked though because it was a major trucker attraction so the club was hella shady. It had one huge stage with seats all around it. No one wanted to sit there because everyone could just stare at you and the dancers at the same time. So I sat of to the side with my friends where all the truckers were. They bought me a dance and I was buggin because I was sitting next to about 25 truckers and they all were starring at us. Since I was 21 I didn't know what the fuck was up. So when one of the girls nipples hit me on the lip I was stunned. Then the other girl's coot hit my arm and I just blurted out "wow, you touched me", and all the truckers started fukn laugh'n. This made the girls kick it into overdrive. Then I just got mauled.
I bought my lady some vanilla body spray and then one of her girlfriends told her that is the smell most strippers like to wear.... I got in big trouble.
Unfortunately I have not been to a strip club in about 3 years now. All my dollars go to vinyl and hardware.