C
Copenhagen
Guest
I found the below list a bit funny, thought some of you might to...
The white trash 10 commandments
1. You shall have no other Gods before me -- except for cable TV.
2. You shall not make any carved image of Heaven above, cuz God owns the merchandising rights. Don't try horning in on His turf or He'll beat your ass with pool cue.
3. You shall not take the Lord's name in vain, unless it involves bosses, congressmen, the Dallas Cowboys or shooting yourself in the spleen while you're out pheasant hunting.
4. Remember the Sabbath day, keep it holy. If God wanted you to work, he would have made football on Tuesdays.
5. Honor your father and mother, cuz someday they're gonna croak. You could inherit yourself their F-150 if you stop acting like an ingrate.
6. You shall not commit murder, except when there's a good reason, like finding your old man in bed with a 16-year-old cashier from the Dairy Queen.
7. You shall not commit adultery. Okay, just don't do it at the motel where your sister-in-law works.
8. You shall not steal. (Only applies in Utah and Canada.)
9. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor, unless you figure he's gonna rat you out on that bowling alley robbery you did. Then beat him to the punch.
10. You shall not covet your neighbor's house, nor shall you covet your neighbor's wife, especially if he's about to get released on parole. Then again, if he's doing time for something sissy like embezzling from a flower shop, covet all you want.
The white trash 10 commandments
1. You shall have no other Gods before me -- except for cable TV.
2. You shall not make any carved image of Heaven above, cuz God owns the merchandising rights. Don't try horning in on His turf or He'll beat your ass with pool cue.
3. You shall not take the Lord's name in vain, unless it involves bosses, congressmen, the Dallas Cowboys or shooting yourself in the spleen while you're out pheasant hunting.
4. Remember the Sabbath day, keep it holy. If God wanted you to work, he would have made football on Tuesdays.
5. Honor your father and mother, cuz someday they're gonna croak. You could inherit yourself their F-150 if you stop acting like an ingrate.
6. You shall not commit murder, except when there's a good reason, like finding your old man in bed with a 16-year-old cashier from the Dairy Queen.
7. You shall not commit adultery. Okay, just don't do it at the motel where your sister-in-law works.
8. You shall not steal. (Only applies in Utah and Canada.)
9. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor, unless you figure he's gonna rat you out on that bowling alley robbery you did. Then beat him to the punch.
10. You shall not covet your neighbor's house, nor shall you covet your neighbor's wife, especially if he's about to get released on parole. Then again, if he's doing time for something sissy like embezzling from a flower shop, covet all you want.
